Saturday 25th October 2008.
A coterie of idlers gathered at Dinnington Docks Public House for the inaugural meeting of the Idlers.
Joe was early; surely a sign of a man with too much time on his hands. He was hungry too. Bob found Rick loitering in the car park and managed to force him to the bar first.
Suprisingly the pub was very busy with many people eating including many young children. We found a quiet corner, Joe ordered liver and bacon and discussions began.
The pub was decorated with railway paraphernalia- junctions, signal boxes, engines you name it. But why? We’d already decided that the only docks for miles around were of the botanic variety. So a railway? The pub is situated adjacent to the Fosse Way, a lovely straight roman road. We could only surmise that the locals have mistaken this for a long disused railway (perhaps one axed by Beeching?) and assuming that the pub would have been adjacent to the station (aka villa!) garlanded it accordingly. We idlers say ‘undo Beechings work! These ancient railways are far too long a walk’
Subjects under discussion included Joe’s painting (he hoped he would be away long enough not to have to do any more on his return); Bob’s arches; Male to female sex operations; the plight of the pound; the state of Joe’s liver-the one he was eating.
Wendy and Stellen arrived. They hadn’t been able to decide whether to eat first or risk the pub food. Joe said they had made a mistake. Rick and I were inclined to agree. Joe took offence at the logo on Stellen’s jacket; it clearly stated ‘ACTIVE’ ! Rick suggested that he should not wear it to the next event; Bob suggested he could perhaps embroider the letters ‘IN’ in front.
Wendy said she had never been a member of a club before and wasn’t sure about it. Some discussion occurred concerning whether we should be a club or an association. Despite the fact that ‘association’ takes much longer to write down than the word ‘club’ I would prefer the longer word- the acronym is better.
SadIC versus SadIA(sadier)(saddier)?*
Always look on the bright side was considered a fine ‘motto’ Bob suggested another one could be one of his favourite maxims which was ‘never do today what could be done tomorrow’
Rick produced a run down of the afternoons events/projects/targets/tasks.These were to
Firstly, Find the 1827 Hinton cricket field. And
Secondly, Go to church to find a coat of arms made from something called ' Coade' stone.
The second task suddenly seemed more complicated when Rick produced a tome about the history of coade stone with a price tag of £48.
He insisted that it didn’t matter if we didn’t want to buy one as he only had one thousand for sale anyway. We all flicked through the book very quickly as we didn’t want to appear too interested! Perhaps we would buy one for our wives/mistresses/husbands for xmas. **
So whether to walk or drive. Obviously we drove as it was nearly November.
Lovely church. Old rectory. Joe was very pleased to learn the differences between Barge boards, Soffits and Fascias as he was sure this information would prove useful at some stage in his life.
Gorgeous Hunky Punks alpha examples.
Coat of arms made from Coade Stone very impressive.
Stood in front of the house of Henry Fowler, the renowned lexicographer, and Joe wondered what a futtock was. Bob explained and Rick said that it was not a good idea to use the word too often as one could become obsessed with it. Bob said there was something called a futtock shroud and was it all right to talk about that. Joe said ‘pants’.
Then in search of ancient cricket field. Several fields were examined but only one seemed at all likely and this was now occupied by bullocks who were perhaps using the old pavilion for shelter.( Possibly suitable opponents for Blacksmiths. Suggest Graham arranges a fixture.)
So we were undecided to the exact site of the pitch which kept the idlers happy for it is not in their nature to reach firm conclusions about anything very much.
We stumbled across an old ice house on our return to the village. And finally we failed to find a Roman Villa.
Very fine views and interesting area. Remember to take telescope next time so don’t have to walk so far.
We may meet again soon to idle around Stockland and compare the tastes of the parish's ciders.
* Rick says he still prefers clubs, and he
did consider acronyms which is why he added ‘and Devon’ !
** Rick says there is of course a discount for idlers, but warns against giving a copy to one’s partner for xmas. Unless you wish to part !
Strength in Idleness